I’m a Cubs fan.
It has been an extremely frustrating relationship – borderline abusive. I give and give and give and the Cubs, in return, have slowly eatenme out at my soul from the inside out. After years of torment, I understand why Cubs fans, like Mike Murphy of WSCR, would hate the Cubs, but it seemed odd to me that our south side brethren hated the Cubs with such vigor as well. We are the lovable losers. How could we in any way offend you guys? The Cubs haven’t hurt anyone in like a hundred years. We haven’t even had the opportunity to piss anyone off in 45 years. But after working at a local newspaper under the abusive leadership of Mike Clark (also of sportspros(e)), I now have a better understanding of why you guys are such haters. Here are the Top Ten Reasons to Hate the Cubs (as Sox and Cubs fan).
It has been an extremely frustrating relationship – borderline abusive. I give and give and give and the Cubs, in return, have slowly eaten
Clark’s Top Five Reason to Hate the Cubs as a Sox Fan
5. Who's on first?
5. Who's on first?
Ron Santo belongs in the Hall of Fame as a player, but really, is there a less prepared broadcaster in America? I'm not sure he knows who the opponent is till the third inning or so.
4. You can't get there from here
What a choice: Drive and get ripped off to park your car in a lot where you're blocked in till after last call at Cubby Bear or be wedged sardine-like onto a Red Line train or Clark Street bus.
3. Clueless fans
3. Clueless fans
No, guys, that medium-depth fly ball will NOT leave the park. Act like you've seen a major league game before and only cheer when something truly notable happens.
2. Wrigley Field
2. Wrigley Field
http://www.cubs-fans.com/images/wrigley_field.jpgWhere Cubs fans see ivy and tradition, most people see falling concrete, obstructed views and hour-long waits at overtaxed concession stands for lousy food.
1. One bad century
Usually in America, if you sell a product that doesn't do what it's supposed to, you go out of business. But here are the Cubs, without a championship since the early years of the 20th century, still selling tickets at a record pace. Never has mediocrity been so lucrative.
Dubs’ Top Five Reasons to Hate the Cubs as a Cubs Fan
5. Ticket Prices
$45 for bleacher seats seems a bit excessive. It takes like half a months salary for us poor bloggers just to enjoy a game at the friendly confines. Sucks to be poor.
4. Ronnie “Woo Woo”
A friend of mine asked the question that if there was one person you would kill and get away with it, who would it be? The usual evil emperors of world history like Hitler and Stalin came up. Then my other friend leaned over and said Ronnie “Woo Woo”. We all silently nodded in agreement.
3. The Dusty Baker Years
http://www.vaguespace.net/photos/uncategorized/p1_baker_getty.jpg
This one is 100% personal. Mr. Blauser bled the Cubs for more than 8 million dollars over two years. Now, Blauser hit .300 and OPB’d .400 twice, oddly enough in contract years. Coincidence? The Cubs were so blind on this one it hurts. He OPS’d .885 the year before becoming a Cub. .885 at SS! Awesome! Then he decided to become a lazy ass and came back the next year, after getting paid, to put up a .639 OPS. Really? I hate you Jeff Blauser.
1. 100-freakin’-years
3 comments:
Clark, 'bout time they let ya add a little to TTCS. Like the list. Dubs, you did a nice job too, pal.
Yeah, I'm a Cubbies fan. If we were our normal 10 games out of first---you would have never posted this page. Give us a break! We might actually have a little success in the post-season this year.
Which of those explain why someone who is not a fan would hate the cubs?
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