Top Ten Santo and Hawk Quotes

Friday, I watched the Cubs/Sox game on TV and checked in with Mr. “Hawk” Harrelson for a couple innings before taking the eraser end of the pencil I was using to my ears. On Saturday, I decided that wasn’t enough pain for one series and while driving back and forth from Chicago to Rockford all weekend for the baseball team I coach, I got my fair share of “interesting” broadcasting from Mr. Ron Santo. Anyway, Santo and Harrelson have taken their fair share of criticism over the years for being homers and clowns. So here are the top ten Santo/Hawk quotes.

Santo

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5. Roots for no side

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Santo's has one reaction to a good play for the Cubs...and that is to absolutely lose his mind. He is by far the biggest fan the Cubs have and it takes away from his "broadcasts."

4. Making sense

Oh, they'll go back, absolutely. Absolutely. Hey, they didn't stop coming, and that's a big thing.

I literally have no idea what this is saying…

3. Making sense (again)

It's much more difficult to do now. The pitching is diluted and so more home runs are hit. That makes that category, at least, a lot more competitive.

My brain hurts.

2. Problem Solver

That billy goat, ever since that came in, crazy things have happened. I've said it before, if we don't win in my lifetime, when I die, I'm going to find that [expletive] billy goat and kill him.

Hmmm…I wonder what he wants to do to Bartman?

1. His ability to handle tough situations

Oh, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Maybe the best Santo-ism ever. These were the famous words that came out of Santo when Brant Brown dropped the lazy fly ball in Milwaukee. Top-notch broadcasting.

Hawk

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5. He is well versed in the intricacies of the rulebook.

I'll guarantee you, this will be one protest that's upheld.

This was his reaction to the obstruction call against the Cubs. Actually Hawk, it didn’t get upheld and in fact the umpires got the call right. But at least you showed your knowledge of the rules.

4. Hawk understands that his playing days are over

The use of we and us

Hawk believes he is actually part of the team on the field. I am not sure he realizes his broadcast have no affect on the outcome of the game…

3. His poetic story telling

My behind was so tight you couldn't pull a greased tee from it.

Prove it.

2. His ability to be fair

Yeah but he got the hit that really hurt us, that little duck fart double.

I wish he would just be an announcer. I understand rooting for the team that you are broadcasting for, but really? Duck fart? That is how you want to represent yourself and your team? Duck fart?

1. Modesty

The point is not to be the first person to say something, but to be the first person remembered for saying something.

We know, but we really don’t want to hear it first from you anymore.