Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Top ten Chicago sports bets we’d make

Hey, if a casino could bet a man that he'd die soon, then these may work too.

10 . 30-1 The Blackhawks will win the Stanley Cup in the next ten years

Ten years is a pretty big time frame, but remember just how young Patrick Kane and Johnny Toews are. If the Hawks find a real goalie, the title could come quicker.

9. 10-1 Jerry Owens will never amount to anything in the majors

The guy sucks. Get over him, people.

8. 2-1 The Bulls will take Derrick Rose


Yeah. We like this dude.

7. 20-1 John Paxson will screw everything up

Taking Rose seems unscrew-up-able. But will happen with the rest of the roster? Can Pax find a big shooting guard to team with Rose in the backcourt or a scoring big man? We’d put our money on ‘no’.

6. 10-1 Nick Swisher will tear it up after the second half

Yeah, I read this post. So what. Swisher is the type of hitter than can go on a tear. Once those hits start falling, Swish could carry the Sox.

5. 5-1 Mike Brown will suffer another major injury next season

It’s really a shame Brown can never stay healthy: the Bears are so much better with him on the field. While the early reports look great, aren’t they always? We don’t want to see Brown go down in pain against this season, but it’ll probably happen.

4. 10-1 TTCS will piss off someone else in the next 30 days

Hey Unprofessional Foul, have you guys ever met Freddy Church? He’s one rough sumbitch. If you think P-Bizzle is crazy, wait til’ you get a load of this guy!

3. 500-1 Rex Grossman will establish himself in 2008

I may be Rex’s last believer, but that’s okay. For whatever reason, Grossman has always been able to rally his teammates. Remember the Falcons game three years ago? Grossman can still be the leader the Bears desperately need. At least we hope so.

2. 5-1 The Cubs will not go another 100 years without winning the World Series

We’re not making any bold predictions about how this year will turn out yet, but it would be nearly impossible for the Cubbies next century to be as futile as the current one.

1. 100-1 Ozzie Guillen will lead the White Sox another World Series

We’re not saying it’ll happen this year- though it could. Guillen has dodged enough bullets already, so we think he may be here for a long time. With Carlos Quentin, Josh Fields, John Danks, and Gavin Floyd, the Sox have a good, young nucleus moving forward.

4 comments:

Unknown said...

One thing with Guillen is for sure; he has solidified that he will never be fired. What is really sad regarding the Rose/Beasley situation is that I was actually disappointed in the rumor involving Wade and the #2 for X and the #1, simply because it would mean the Bulls wouldn't get Rose. That's crazy I know, but do I stand alone here?

Rose or Die '08

Freddy in the Chi said...

not sure why a name that is close to mine is mentioned in this post. it wasn't I that posted the top ten reason why soccer would fail here. and my name is not fredric scott church, jr. i'm not a jr. anything.

Zach Martin said...

I'd probably go even money on that owens bet...there is no way he does anything in the MLB.

Tone said...

Good shit man, I like the change of pace here. But, more like 5-1 that The Wizard of Oz will lead the beloved South Side club back to the promise land my friend. U better believe it will happen again.