Top Top Facts About Life When the Cubs Won the 1908 World Series

Truthfully, you every right to label me as a hypocrite with this list. Last week, I decried the constant references to the Cubs and their 100-year World Series drought by the media. And now, I'm doing exactly that by looking at the Top Top Facts About Life When the Cubs Won the 1908 World Series.

But then I thought about it some more and concluded that by being the first to do a list of this kind, I am actually being original.

It's amazing how we can convince ourselves of almost anything.

Either way, hopefully you find this interesting:

10. Henry Ford introduces the Ford Model "T" and sells it for $850

Rumor has it that after the Cubs won the World Series, pitcher Mordecai Brown bought the Model "T" with his bonus and immediately threw some 22-inch Lexani rims and Louis Vittonn leather interior on it. That ride was sick.

9. The average life expectancy was 47 years

Julio Franco was just barely entering his prime at the age of 47.

8. The maximum speed limit in most cities was 10 MPH

Apparently my Huffy would be the equivalent of a Hiyabusa sports bike back then. I get that baby up to at least 12 mph going down the hill by my house.

That's crazy fast.

7. Roughly 230 murders were committed in all of 1908

Death isn't funny so I'll just let the numbers speak for themselves.

6. Eight-percent of homes had a telephone

Can you imagine how long this Brett Favre situation would have taken to play out without the telephone?

They'd get a deal done in 2010, right after Favre receives his AARP card.

5. Six-percent of Americans had graduated high school

Most of them decided to play overseas because of David Stern's age requirement in the NBA.

4. Population of Las Vegas, Nevada = 30

Pacman wouldn't have had to make it rain in the clubs, only a light mist would have been necessary.

3. The average worker pulled in anywhere between $200 and $400 annually

And Devin Hester thought being paid $445 thousand before getting a new contract was a slap in the face.

2. Marijuana, heroin and morphine were all over the counter drugs

This entire era is still under question as to the legitimacy of their statistics.

Cubs SS Joe Tinker's team leading 6 HR season in 1908 just seems too good to be true.

1. 90% of Doctors didn't have a college education

I'm thoroughly convinced the Cubs still employ some of these physicians today.

Their remarkable treatments on Kerry Wood's blister have defied modern science and will have him ready to pitch sometime in September.

Top Ten Reasons to Care More about Your Madden Dynasty than Your Homework

Since we are less than two weeks away from Madden 09, and three weeks away from most schools starting up....

10 Because the best thing about college is blowing off class

Remember in high school how you were stuck in one building for like six hours every day, with no where to run? College gives you the ability to skip that Literature class you hate so much and spend some quality time with virtual LaDanian Tomlinson.

9 Because in video games, it's possible for Rex Grossman not to screw everything up

Have you people been to Bourbonnais yet this year? Grossman is looking pathetic, and there seems to be no hope he’ll ever bust out of his role as the NFL’s biggest punch line. But in Madden…Rex can get the job done. Especially when you trade Olin Kruetz and a future number one pick for Randy Moss.

8 Because unlike school, you can play ALL your madden games online

Nothing is sweeter than online classes. But few kids take more than one per semester. Since the new v-game consoles came out, now you can do all your Madden gaming versus online. Nothing is more glorious than avoiding social interaction.

7 Because you can’t trade your professor for draft picks

Few things are more fun than selling off all your veterans for future draft picks in Madden. If you could only do that in school…

6 Because Madden the only place where Mike Brown and Phil Barnes have the same injury rating

TTCS’ oft-sick Monday-specialist is similar the Bears Mike Brown. Both are power players when healthy, but often succumb to debilitating illness or injury.

5 Because you can sim through the preseason

Is there anything worse than the NFL preseason? Of course, it’s the Pro Bowl. But seriously, the NFL preseason is one of the least enjoyable things ever. At least two or three star players get lost to injury in the preseason every year, which is easily avoidable in Madden by simulating those four weeks with injuries turned off.

4 Because my speed rating in real life isn’t a 100

TTCS’ best athlete is a hotly debated topic. In approximately 1934, Fred-Ex Church was stellar wrassler’ for Minooka High. Olsen claims to be a seven handicap on the golf course, Phillips believes he was a 6-1 version of Amare Stoudemire in his athletic prime, and Zach Martin played club baseball in college. Me? I hold the distinct honor of being the slowest kid on my high school track team. Needless to say, none of us could crack a 70 speed rating in Madden, let alone a Hester-like 100.

3 Because unlike when you fail a test, in Madden, you can always push the restart button

Few things are worse than bombing a final exam, but losing your undefeated Madden season in the Super Bowl is just as devastating. Luckily, video games allow you to restart the whole the thing and forget it ever happened. Though I haven’t pressed the restart button in about 13 years (pinky swear), I’m sure some people (cough-Zach-cough) still do.

2 I'm a journalism major so I know I’m going to be poor anyways

1 The Truck Stick doesn't work in real life

Nothing is more satisfying in Madden than plowing a defender with a power running back like Brandon Jacobs. If only the truck stick worked in real life, it would be a lot easier to find a place to stand on the CTA (imagine 10 people going flying) or to get to the front of the line at Chipotle. All you would have to do is lower your shoulder.

Top Ten Reasons To Get Excited About the Bears

BY DANNY SHERIDAN

Even with both baseball teams in pennant races, I really miss football. With training camps underway, I’m counting down the days until the Bears open their season Sept. 7. Despite what you may think, it was pretty easy coming up with the top ten reasons to be excited about the Bears this year. Notice though how the quarterback and wide receivers positions were left off this list. If I had an 11, the opportunity to read Tribune Bears beat writer David Haugh everyday for the next six months would have grabbed that spot.

10. No more Cedric Benson or Adam Archuleta

Why again did the Bears trade Thomas Jones and Chris Harris? At least we’ll no longer have to watch Benson fall down at the first bit of contact, or Archuleta miss tackle after tackle by being too slow and out of position. Benson was a bust on the field and cancer in the locker room. Archuleta is proof that combine workouts are way overrated.

9. Tight Ends

Now if someone can just get them the ball. ESPN had the Bears tandem of Desmond Clark and Greg Olsen only ninth in their overall tight end rankings, but that’s primarily due to the uncertainty at the quarterback position. Clark has posted back to back solid seasons, while this could be a breakout year for Olsen. It’d be nice to see Ron Turner run more plays with both of them on the field, which could open things up for a weak group of wide receivers.

8. Schedule

The Bears play only five teams that made the playoffs last season. Tampa Bay, Tennessee, and now Green Bay (without Favre) are beatable, leaving only Jacksonville and Indianapolis. Luckily, they play the Colts opening night, meaning Peyton Manning might not be 100% yet after his recent knee surgery. In the division, Minnesota has a great defensive line, great offensive line, and great running back, but not much else. Detroit still has no defense, while there are a lot of questions right now in Packerland. Plus, there are games against Atlanta, St. Louis, Carolina, and Houston, all very winnable.

7. The rookies

After the draft, every team thinks they made out great, so we won’t know for quite a while whether Chris Williams and Matt Forte are any good. The Bears desperately needed a tackle, so Williams was the obvious choice. Forte seems like one of those guys who could end up being really good or really bad. With the passing game a huge question mark, the Bears have to be able to run the football a lot better than last season’s league low 3.1 ypc. Don’t sleep on Marcus Harrison or Craig Steltz either. Both could wind up being two more Jerry Angelo second day steals.


6. It’s about time for football, any football

This has nothing to do with the Bears. Here’s a top ten list within a top ten list (this may be a first) on why football is better than baseball.

10. A pulled hamstring sidelines a baseball player for a month, while football players play through much worse.

9. Statistics are only a part of the NFL

8. 16 games is a lot better than 162

7. Football has a real draft

6. Baseball players make too much money

5. Officials can actually move

4. Alex Rodriguez doesn’t have to worry about getting sacked

3. NFL players show passion

2. You can play in the rain

1. Monday Night Football

5. Mike Brown is back (for now)

It was the right call to give Brown one last chance. I realize he’s played only 21 games the last four years, but when healthy, he’s one of the top safeties in the league. Certainly, it’s a big “if”, considering Brown’s recent history, but none of his injuries have been the same, which is good. Brown’s more valuable to the defense than even Urlacher, but he’s got to stay on the field.  

4. No Brett Favre (we think)

Unless of course he does a complete 180 and stays in Green Bay, or Ted Thompson is stupid enough to trade him to Minnesota. Yeah, I know the Bears have beaten Favre in six of their last eight meetings, but look at it logically. With Favre under center, the Packers are clearly the class of the NFC North, and possibly the entire NFC. Put Aaron Rodgers under center and the division becomes wide open.  

3. Low expectations

Flashback to September 2005, when Sports Illustrated had the Bears ranked 32nd out of 32 teams to start the year. For some stupid reason, I predicted 11 wins, just to be different. Low and behold, even with Kyle Orton calling the shots, and no Devin Hester, I was right. From the people I’ve talked to, I’m hearing on average anywhere between six to eight wins this year. Maybe the media’s gloomy predictions (Bears are 25th in ESPN’s current power rankings) will turn into a rallying cry.

2. A dominating defense

When everyone is healthy of course. Mike Brown, Nathan Vasher, Tommie Harris, Lance Briggs, Brian Urlacher, and Dusty Dvoracek all either missed significant amounts of time or played at considerably less than 100% last year. Remember how dominating this defense was for three quarters in the opener versus the Chargers? That’s a glimpse of how good this unit could be if they can avoid injuries. Urlacher and Briggs are two of the best at their positions, while Vasher and Tillman might be one of the top five cornerback tandems. The line has only one real star in Harris, but a bunch of good players. They still know how to force turnovers, something that will be needed to help a bad offense. Fantasy owners, this is a top three defense, trust me.

1. Devin Hester

No explanation necessary here. Funny how far 40 million dollars can go to healing a sore hamstring. And as a bonus, reports are Hester could take part in close to 50% of the offensive snaps this year.

Top Ten things Derrek Lee should steal from Wrigley

A few weeks ago, new-era Yankee Clipper Derek Jeter said he would take something before the bulldozer was taken to Yankee Stadium. While Wrigley Field may have another 20 years until its demolition, these are a few things Cub icon Derrek Lee should swipe from the confines.

10. Ernie Bank's statue


Courtesy of: http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2158/2380727591_c3e91d6984.jpg?v=0


Courtesy of:http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3254/2384761821_90099eeba0.jpg

It is the newest item on the list. But this was actually a really cool concept, but easily could and should have been done about 15 years ago. The engraving was initially checked for grammatical errors by TTCS's own Freddy Church.

9. Lights


Photo Courtesy of:http://www.derekmiller.us/baseball/images/stadiumpics/wrigley03.jpg

Wrigley was the last stadium in the majors, and probably any level below t-ball, to insert lighting. The funny part is they commemorated 8/8/88 by unveiling the "new" lights. As a fan I would have been really upset because I am pretty sure the bulb had been invented almost a century sooner. That would have been cool 8/8/1888.

8. 1908 World Series flag


Photo Courtesy of:http://tommcmahon.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/2008/01/18/cubscentury.gif

Yes every team honors any World Series title they have ever won. Heck, Batavia proudly dons their 1912 basketball state championship banner in the gym. But there should be a rule in sports where banners cannot be put up unless a championship has been won within a hundred-year span. I think that's fair.

7. Troughs


Photo Courtesy of:http://www.urinal.net/wrigley_field/Wrigley1.jpg

I laugh at the thought every time I go in there. It's not nostalgic, it's disgusting. I won't go into any details about what is flowing through my mind when I step up to the "urinals." Though if D-Lee did own a frat house it would be a neat concept. I still don't see how Moises Alou could "miss" the troughs.

6. Scoreboard


Courtesy of: http://www.airninja.com/pictures/chicago/wrigleyscoreboard.jpg

Now this is one cool part of Wrigley. Though you may not get to see replays of any sort, the idea that there are people working continuously to keep the scoreboard up to date is unreal.

5. Harry Caray's Mic


Photo Courtesy of:http://www.batigers.net/sitebuilder/images/Harry-447x333.jpg

I do not even know if they still use and/or have the mic available, but he revolutionized commentary as we know it today. With his witty and often politically incorrect statements, who wouldn't want to own that.

4. Bartman's seat


Photo Courtesy of:http://www.ayuh.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/bartman.jpg

If anyone on the Cubs appreciates that seat, it's Lee. Then a member of the Marlins, Derrek saw his team's fate change after that lazy foul ball. It was Bartman's fate that was really modified however.

3. Ronnie Woo


Photo Courtesy of:http://cache.daylife.com/imageserve/08o45dCfRx3jC/610x.jpg

Derrek can pay him to operate the scoreboard.

2. "Wrigley Field" sign


Photo Courtesy of:http://www.crownaudio.com/pressart/pr149_hz-3.jpg

One of the true icons of the stadium is the red sign that rests above the gate behind home plate. In Lee's free time he could write whatever he wanted in the electronic portion.

1. Ivy


Photo Courtesy of:http://www.cubbiesbaseball.com/images/ivy.jpg

In reality, this could be taken without anybody knowing, because I have been told that even a little piece spreads like crazy eventually. When people think Wrigley, they think of the ivy, the best thing any Cub could take from the stadium.

Top Ten Stories That Need to Go Away

Today's world is the greatest possible time in history to live in if you are a die hard sports junky.

Information is available instantaneously at your fingertips within seconds of it occurring and in some cases, can be watched from your computer or mobile phone.

However, with the continuous coverage of sports, a new problem has arisen that can be directly attributed to ESPN and talk radio: the overkill of certain storylines.

Lately, there has been an abundance of them and today we're giving you the Top Ten Stories That Need to Go Away:

10.The Cowboys

With a roster that could easily quit football tomorrow and become cast members on the Surreal Life, the Cowboys are sure to be leading the ESPN broadcasts in the very near future.

You know the storylines (Pac...Adam Jones, T.O., Romo/Jessica Simpson, etc...) and you know how they'll be talked about ad nauseum by every member and broadcast outlet of ESPN and the NFL Network. To make matters worse, HBO is traveling to Dallas for their 'Hard Knocks' series where they will give an all access look into the Boys' training camp.

I'm looking forward to this about as much as the possibility of me having to wear diapers in a nursing home. It's that bad.

9.Spygate

I wonder if the guy who first came up with the tag 'Spygate' is getting any royalties off of it because if not, he's getting absolutely robbed.

The thing about Spygate is I really don't see it as being that big of a deal and I'll prove it by using the Madden video games to prove it.

Growing up we all had the one friend who would repeatedly try to sneak a look at your controller in hopes of learning what play you were about to run. You probably realized he was doing it, but it really didn't matter because you knew the play would work and ended up wiping the floor with him anyway.

Same goes for the Pats, except they were going to wipe the floor with the New York Jets even if they didn't even know their own plays.

8.Tim Donaghy – The Fixer

The man who single- handedly destroyed the credibility of the NBA is trying to bring anyone within a ten-mile radius down with him and ESPN is loving every second of it.

Despite looking like some sweaty guy you'd find trying to hoop at the local YMCA, Donaghy has quickly ascended to the upper echelon of scumbags that plague the world of sports. Lock him up, throw away the key and force him to watch reruns of the Tour de France from now until eternity.

7.Barkley and his Gambling Debts

Why is it anyone's business if Barkley chooses to blow $30k in a weekend gambling binge out in the casinos of Las Vegas?

I can't imagine the big fella is hurting for cash these days with his T-Mobile commercials and commentator gig on TNT's NBA coverage. If he was still playing I'd acknowledge this might be an issue and worthy of sports media coverage.

Let the fat man roll the dice and hit on 19 whenever he wants. Just because he sucks at gambling doesn't mean he doesn't have the right to do it anyway.

6.A-Rod – Madonna – C-Rod Love Triangle

Anytime figures of the sports world cross over into pop culture I become physically ill. Alex Rodriguez popping up on TMZ.com because of an alleged affair with Madonna has quickly become a favorite talking point for my girlfriend and her closest gal pals.

This, I cannot allow.

But the question I'm asking about this whole situation is this: if your Alex Rodriguez, is Madonna the best you could do? Wasn't Scarlett Johansson or some Victoria Secret model availble for some late night tryst and not some 40-something woman who has more creases on her face than an old catcher's mitt?

Maybe I'm being harsh, but I'm praying for a swift divorce and another classic A-Rod choke job if the Yanks make the playoffs.

5.Barry Bonds – No Team Wants You

Barry and his agent are imploring the MLB Players Association to look into possible collusion amongst MLB teams that may be collectively trying to keep the all-time HR champ out of the game.

I can end the investigation for you right now Barry. The reason nobody is signing you is because NOBODY WANTS YOU ON THEIR TEAM!

Nobody wants the circus that comes along with having you on in the clubhouse and nobody on the team wants to deal with the daily barrage of questions about your contributions to the team and their opinions about steroids.

Go crawl into a hole and deflate on your own time and stop wasting ours with unrealistic hopes of donning a MLB uniform again

It's over.

4.Roger Clemens – Brian McNamee – Steroids

This is one scenario where a death match might actually be the best solution to ceasing the ridiculous coverage of these two steroid-bound idiots. The story just picked up steam again after mailing receipts were found that were supposedly from shipments of roid-juice directly to one Mr. Roger Clemens. His reputation is tarnished, nobody believes a words he says and the Hall of Fame seems long gone at this point.

Let it go.

3.The Chicago Cubs 100-year World Series Drought

As a Sox fan, I probably bring this little tidbit up about once a week but I'd be happy to put an end to it if it means the media will do the same.

The montages, the timelines, the search for a human being that was actually alive when they last won the World Series is not going to stop until next year when the media starts it all over again.

In no way am I saying that I hope the Cubs actually win a title, but it'd be a whole lot easier if everyone stopped anticipating an event that's not going to happen. This is the one team in history that defies the law of averages and I've got a 100 years of stats to prove it.

If I'm wrong, I like my crow medium rare with extra salt and pepper.

2.Tiger Woods

You wont' find a bigger Tiger Woods fan than me and I'm already sick and tired of hearing about the 'Tiger Effect' on golf.

Is it really such a surprise that the majority of people don't watch golf when Tiger's not playing?

Every story that's been written on the subject must have been done by a reporter that has gone to the John Madden school of sports analysis. Tell them what they already know and have known for years and only make only the most obvious of observations and rest easy knowing that you'll never be wrong.

He's hurt and golf will suffer.

Enough said.

1.Brett Favre

The city of Chicago is collectively fighting back the urge to drive up to Green Bay and force Packers GM Ted Thompson to make a decision on whether to keep, trade or release Brett Favre before we tar and feather the man. Favre has owned the Bears in his career and to watch coverage of him day after day literally is the equivalent of being stuck in an elevator for 48 hours with seven ex-girlfriends who are in the mood to discuss everyone of your faults.

I don't care what the hell they do up there, but please just end the insanity before John Clayton has to purchase Jose Canseco's trailer and park it front of Favre's house in Louisiana until opening day.

Look at Clayton and tell me he hasn't suffered enough strolling through life looking like that. He makes Carrot Top look like Fabio.

Top ten athletes that would make great Batman villains

10. The Scarecrow = Bob Sanders

Like Dr. Jonathon Crane, the 5-7 Sanders isn’t physically imposing at first glance. But both Scarecrow and Sanders are masters of creating fear. Just ask any NFL receiver who try to go over the middle against the Colts.

9. Ichiro = Ra’s al Ghul

After hearing about Ichiro’s profanity laced All-Star Game pep talks, is there any doubt that he’d make a great superhero villain? People also seem to believe the impossible from Ra’s al Ghul, which is kind of similar to how everyone thinks Ichiro could hit a lot homers, you know, if he was into that sort of thing.

8. Poison Ivy = Madonna

Though she’s not technically an athlete, Madonna has been at the center of sports biggest story for the last month. Anyways, we’re pretty sure he could kick Mike Fontenot’s ass, so that’s got to count for something.

7. Catwoman = Camilo Villegas

The picture speaks for itself.

6. Mr. Freeze = Greg Norman

Get it, because Norman ‘freezes’ up in golf’s biggest moments? Come on, I thought it was creative. Plus, Norman’s wife, former tennis star Chris Evert, is old enough to soon be cryogenically frozen. The similarities are remarkable.

5. The Riddler = Ricky Williams

Much like Edward Nigma, you never know what you’re going to get from Williams. One day he was the NFL’s best tailback, the next he quit the league and forfeited millions so he was free to get cheesy.

4. Bane = Shawne Merriman

Both Bane and Merriman seem to possess other worldly strength, and neither did it naturally. Still, I personally have never seen Bane taken out by Maurice Jones Drew. Advantage: Bane.

3. The Joker = Milton Bradley

The Joker is all about anarchy, and I would imagine Milton Bradley shares the same values. Both Joker and Bradley seem to act on a whim, while destruction surrounds them. Just the way they like it.

2. Two Face = Carlos Boozer

Boozer seemed like a good guy at Duke and in Cleveland, just as Harvey Dent did as Gotham’s DA. But both took a turn for the worst. Say what you will about Dent, but at least he never screwed over a blind man.

1. The Penguin = John Daly

Both are fat slobs that moonlight as heroes of the underground. Both have bad vices: for Daly, it's Hooters and ciggarettes, for Penguin it's birds and umbrellas. Maybe the strangest coincidence? Both of these freaks are filthy rich.